I will wake up at three AM
And I will roll over
Into your arms.
You will rub my back
Until I fall back to sleep.
I will wait for that.
i dont like getting yelled at i literally stand there and burst into tears
and they’re like WHY ARE YOU CRYING?!!?! It’s because you’re fucking yelling at me you shithead
I’m glad people can’t read my mind cause all they’d be hearing is me saying lmao to myself
me: *sees a white boy* *locks my car doors*
white boy: *knocks on window* what would you be doing if I was in there with you ;)
Hannah Hart, My Drunk Kitchen
the realest life advice you will ever get
People have written a lot of touchy-feely pieces on this subject but I thought I’d get right to the heart of the matter
The potatoes have escaped
things to say if someone asks why you are so quiet
- "i don’t have much to say"
- (shrug with a smile)
- "i like listening"
- (with clenched teeth) “there are wasps in my mouth”
My goal is to be that rich single aunt that flies everywhere and wears designer clothing and brings expensive gifts to her less successful family members